


Nevertheless

by alezander



Category: Original Work
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-03
Updated: 2017-06-03
Packaged: 2018-11-08 11:03:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11080221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alezander/pseuds/alezander
Summary: for February 2017, with the theme "Blinded"





	Nevertheless

**Author's Note:**

> for February 2017, with the theme "Blinded"

 

He is, as ever longing for you. Eyes opened or closed, he continues to see you. And so do I, for I am his eyes.

It has long been a secret between the two of us. Hidden in his fidgety stares and the quivering of his voice, he was in love with you. It was difficult, but he resolved to lock his feelings for you deep in his heart. Now that it has come to this, watching him is unbearable. He has cast a spell upon himself, a dream of us three still together.

I am, as ever, tempted by his eyes. In the mornings, I join him as he goes out to walk among the irises which you love. He never seems to notice me, for he doesn't look at me. The two of you talk and I stand quietly by the side, just like how we used to. I'll have you know that I hated that. You've always hogged him to yourself, you selfish witch.

The evenings are better. Somehow, the spell wears off and he refuses to eat, so I feed him. He becomes quiet as his mind realizes you are not around. He goes to bed but he doesn't sleep. Tightly, he clutches his hair and curls around himself. He cries for you, his voice loud and hoarse. Gently I hold him, whispering shushes and rubbing soft circles on his back, and only then does he see me. He looks at me, tears clouding his eyes. He buries his head to my chest. I press him closer to me, aware of his softness and the trembling of his body. God help me, he is beautiful.

You are, as ever, greedy and selfish. I've always wanted him. I know you know that. In my mind, I've marked him mine countless times yet even in my fantasies, he calls for you as I embrace him. You've always known, but you never intended to hand him to me. Even when the three of us were together, you loved him more than I, your brother.

You crashed and drowned. You were burned and buried, you were scattered in the wind. You're gone, you died. You're gone, you're gone, you're gone. But why? Dear sister, you're still here.

Did you know? My heart broke when I first learned about you. No matter how vexing you were, I love you very much, because you were the best sister I could ever have. Your absence is searingly painful for us both, but dear sister, I'm begging you. If you're dead, stay dead. He keeps seeing you, and I too.

Every night he wears himself out screaming for you, his tears and voice all used up. He tells me to kill him, so he can be with you again. Look what you've done, you bitch. Let him go. I'm begging you. Let him go, he's mine. He's mine, he's mine, he's mine. Even in death, you tie him to you, you selfish, selfish sister.

Nevertheless, there is nothing he can do. You're gone and there's only me. He depends on me and cries to me every night. I take care of him. If I tell him I love him, he won't be able to refuse. It's only a matter of time until he loves me back. After all, I'm all he has left. Your death has served me well. Thank you, dearest little sister.

He longs for you, I long for him, and you are somewhere laughing at this absurdity we found ourselves in. Now tell me, who among us is the most blinded?

**Author's Note:**

> written while listening to the song "First Love" by Suga from BTS


End file.
